Help neurodivergent children stay safe while socialising

Neurodivergent children and young people often become victims online through someone who knows them offline and is aware of their difficulties. This means the perpetrator has the knowledge to manipulate their target.

They might influence your child to behave in ways they wouldn’t otherwise or give access to personal accounts or information.

Neurodivergent children and young people might struggle to recognise when others are looking to harm them. If they think a stranger is a friend, they might feel like they have to do things that those people ask, even if it makes them feel uncomfortable.

Many children see the number of followers or subscribers they have as a sign of popularity. For a child with neurodiverse needs, this might be even more important, especially if they’re often excluded or made to feel unpopular offline.

Unfortunately, this can lead them to posting content that gets the most attention. This can include dangerous online challenges or outrageous content for likes and comments.

It can also mean that they accept friends or followers who they don’t actually know. These people might be harmless but some can target their vulnerabilities.

Children with additional needs are more likely to send nude images. This can come down to various reasons.

• Relationship expectations: Research shows that children feel like there is an expectation to share nudes in a relationship.
• Threats: Some abusers might exploit children for nudes. Neurodivergent children are particularly vulnerable if they cannot assess the risk. Abusers might also threaten to share the images unless the child does what they’re told.
• Sharing without permission: If your child has sent a nude to someone, the recipient might send the image to someone else. This means more people see it than your child expected.

Many neurodivergent children do not understand how data impacts their lives. They might not fully recognise how privacy settings work or what ‘personal information’ actually means. So, they might share personal information without fully realising it.

The best way to help neurodivergent children recognise potential harm is to discuss what it might look like. You can use news stories or real scenarios to do this. Remember to:

• Use distancing techniques. Instead of asking what your child could do in a situation, ask them what advice they would give to someone else in that situation. This is particularly useful for children who are anxious or more likely to worry about issues.
• Reassure them. Explain that with the right setup and positive choices, they can stay safe. Assure them that no matter what happens, you will work together to make sure that risk doesn’t come to harm.

Whether through curiosity or accident, your child might stumble across violent, sexual or otherwise inappropriate content. Some content might be appropriate but still upsetting to them.

Explain that if they feel sad, angry or worried about something, they should tell you about it. Together, you can then decide what to do about it.

This kind of conversation can help them be more mindful. If something makes them feel negatively, they do not need to keep seeing or doing it.

Neurodivergent children will often act without thinking through all potential consequences. As such, they might share content or information that could put them in harm’s way.

So, discuss:

• What personal information is. Giving examples like their full name, phone number, school and family’s full names can help them understand.
• What someone can do with personal information. Explain that people might pretend to be them if they have their personal information. This can make it look like they’re doing or saying things they never did.
• What is and isn’t okay to share. Give clear examples of things that are appropriate like photos of a craft project or their pet. Then, give clear examples of what is not appropriate like a picture of themselves in their school uniform, which can tell people their location.

You might find it useful to review the social feed of a public figure like their favourite celebrity. Go through each post together and decide whether it would be safe for your child to share the same content or not.